Every mother has thought about their daughter’s wedding day at one point or another, and when they get the news that she’s engaged, it’s an incredibly exciting moment. There is a lot to do as the mother of the bride, and it can get very hectic as you try to help your daughter plan her wedding as well as offering advice and keeping her calm. It is a very important role to play, so here are a few tips to help you navigate your duties:
It’s Her Day, Not Yours
While you might have fantasized about your daughter’s wedding day for years, it’s unlikely that your vision will look the same as hers. She might not want to have the service in the same venue as you would like, or her taste in décor might clash with yours. However, it’s important to remember that it’s her day, not yours. Giving advice is one thing, but taking over and making her feel bad about what she wants will be counterproductive and cause unnecessary tensions and upset. Your role is to be supportive and to make sure she has the perfect day, the way she wants it to be.
Tradition states that the parents of the bride pay for the wedding, but in the modern age, a lot of families have moved away from this, with couples either paying for the day themselves or both sets of parents contributing in some way equally. You might have offered to make a financial contribution to your daughter’s wedding, whether it’s paying for her dress or covering the cost of the venue, but either way, make sure you’re setting boundaries. Making sure your daughter is happy is important, but you need to let her know how much you can afford to spend on her wedding. Sit down with her and her partner to discuss this so that these boundaries are made clear from the very beginning.
Your daughter will have a lot to do when it comes to planning the wedding, so much so that she might begin to feel overwhelmed. While you want to make sure you’re not taking over, offering to do some research into venues, catering, and even dress options could be something she will greatly appreciate. For example, if she is uncertain about what kind of wedding dresses she likes, sit down with her and look at websites like The Sposa Group to help her get some inspiration.
Ask for Her Opinion on Your Outfit
As the mother of the bride, you want to look your best on the big day, but taking your daughter with you shopping and asking her opinion is important. She may want your color scheme to match her bridesmaid’s gowns or fit in with a theme she has in mind for her wedding. You need to find something you’re comfortable in but that she likes as well.
Prepare for the Unexpected
Finally, no matter how well planned a wedding is, there is still a good chance that one or two things might go wrong just before or on the day. As the mother of the bride, it’s your job to help your daughter stay calm and find solutions to the problem. Work with the maid of honor to devise a back-up plan for things that could go awry on the big day.
Seeing your daughter marry the love of her life is an incredibly special moment for every parent. Make sure you’re getting ready for your role as mother of the bride with these top tips.