It doesn’t stop me!:

Call me un-Australian, but I don’t get the Melbourne Cup.

You hear about it being the race that stops a nation but I’ve never stopped for it.

Is there something wrong with me?

I don’t get why some people seem to go there looking quite glamorous and gorgeous and then get so blind drunk that they have no idea what they did, or maybe who they went home with.

I don’t get ‘sweeps’.

I thought Calcutta was the old-fashioned name of a city in India until I was at the pub on the weekend with some mates and they ‘conducted’ a Calcutta – I didn’t enter.

I don’t know why people feel it’s the one day of the year when it’s a good idea to have a bet: I don’t know much about the betting industry but I’m betting (yes, pun intended), they’re never the losers on the day.

It's not just the Melbourne Cup. I don’t really get racing either. If you see it as a good reason to go out with some friends, maybe get dressed-up, and just have a fun day out – fine, I get that.

But to put it in the same genre as sport? I am sorry but, for me, racing isn’t what I think of as sport.

And to have a horse who is such a celebrity that she has her own biography, website and Twitter account? Yes, I have heard of Black Caviar and I know that her undefeated streak of 25 races is a wonder. It says much about her breeding, heart and those who train her – but a horse as celebrity? Mind you, when I pondered this question with some friends recently, we agreed that Black Caviar was a much more wholesome and engaging celebrity than many people.

So excuse me while I tune-out for a few days. I’m not a party-pooper – just ask my friends – but while others are at play, I’ll be working at catching-up on a few things.

If you’re ‘in’ to the Melbourne Cup, I hope you have a great day and I’d love to hear why you are to help me understand it.