Ten years could be a long time but it feels like it was just yesterday. It’s 10 years today since I had my heart broken for the first time. Truth be told I’ve never been hurt quite as much since, or perhaps I haven’t let anyone close enough to do quite so much damage.
Back then I was an all-knowing 22-year-old. Days away from the ripe old age of 23 - but what the hell did I know about love?! By that age my Mum was married and my sister was about to be wed, so perhaps I give my young self too little credit. There we were, a young couple, planning schools and names for our unborn children, swept up in the fantasy of what we hoped was still to come.
Ten years later and I’ve learned everything and nothing about love and life. I know that had my heart remained unbroken my life would bear no resemblance to my everyday now. My ex is living the life of my former dreams complete with spouse and two kids. And here I am, living my new dream. A different dream.
I’m living in a country I didn’t know existed back when I was planning a forever with him that wouldn’t last. I’m taking on hobbies and challenges that would have been beyond my wildest dreams ten years ago had my imagination even stretched that far. I now realise that the woman I am now would have remained hidden had I not shed far too many tears over a life I couldn’t imagine losing.
Ten years ago as I got into bed after a busy weekend the first love of my life broke my heart.
Today, as I get into bed after another busy weekend I look forward to the day when I meet the last love of my life - the man who will take care of that once-broken heart, long after we’ve started to count our time together in decades rather than years.